A World of Change

Wow, it has been over a year since I have written... Life has just been a whirlwind, a lot of things have happened. Many ups and down, but all have lead to where I am, and I am very happy with it! Show me your ways, LORD, teach me your paths. - Psalm 25:4 God has really put great people in my life this past year. He has provided amazing roommates when I was done nannying, amazing friends, and a great place to work. It hasn't all been easy, but I am grateful for all that has happened and made me a much better person for it. I have found this amazing church and am so blessed to have such great community with my roommates, in my home group, and even at work! God never ceases to amaze me in providing. More to updates to come!!

Another Big Move!

So, I haven't written in a while. I guess that's what happens when you don't have internet where you live...

Anyway, I am hoping to write a lot more now since I have internet and I have more free time!

I have recently moved from Pennsylvania to Tennessee! I felt the Lord calling me from my old job into a new part of life and since I am 24 and single, why not travel and move to new places while I can! I went from being a Program Assistant at the Salvation Army to being a nanny to 3 amazing kids. I love my new job and am excited for all it has to bring. The kids are 9, 7, and 4. The mom is also pregnant with her forth! Even after a week of being here I know this is exactly where I am suppose to be. I am getting to help this amazing Christian family raise their kids. I get to live with the family, so I am consumed by helping with homework, making meals, sword fighting, and much more fun kid stuff, as well as teaching them about our wonderful Creator.

My main goal is to love these kids and treat them like my own and make sure I instill in them the love for Jesus and teach them about His love for them. It's great to have a family that is wanting to continue to grow. We started a scripture a week with the kids and hopefully that will help them to put God's word in their heart so when things get tough, they know who truly loves them.

My passion for kids has only grown since I have been here and am very excited for this new journey in life and can't wait to see what God has in store for me while I am here. I pray I can do the best and serve this family and show them the love of Christ.

I am also excited to meet up with old friend that have moved down here and meet new friends. I am excited to have that community of believers around me again. I felt very isolated and alone at times in PA, so I am going to make it a priority to not let that happen here.

I am very excited for all that is to come! I pray I follow God through it all and be sensitive to his leadings!

What is our purpose?

I have been thinking a lot lately about what my purpose really is while I am here. I really hope that I am fulfilling my purpose, and I guess I will never really know until I am with my maker. But, I am going to try my hardest to do what I feel I am called to do. I am also going to try my hardest to work for the creature of the universe than for just doing what I am doing to accomplish a task at work. I know that it can be easy around here to get distracted by our tasks and not focus on what we are ultimately here to do.

I pray that God will continue to guide me as to where I am suppose to be serving him, whether it be in the church, at a non-profit, or getting married an being an at-home mom. Whatever it is, I want to follow him wherever he leads me, trying to live out my purpose here on earth.

He has showed you, O man, what is good.
And what does the LORD require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God.
-Micah 6:8

I know I have used this verse before, but I truly believe that God has called us to do 3 simple things that society makes so much more complicated. I hope to follow this verse throughout my entire life and strive for eternal "acceptance" rather than earthly "acceptance." I feel like up until now I have focused on what others have thought and how many friends I have, but what is that going to look like when I get to heaven. What am I going to say to God, "well, I didn't spend as much time with you, in your word, in prayer, and serving you because I was too busy trying to be accepted by others on earth." I really hope that when I get to heaven the Lord says, "well done my good and faithful servant." I would rather have a few close christian friends and dive more into knowing and serving the Lord more than having earthly acceptance.

I know I struggle with this and hope that with discipline and help of other Christians I can continue to strive to live out God's purpose for my life.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight.
-Proverbs 3:5-6

I pray that I can follow these 2 key passages, both the one from Micah and Proverbs. I need a life change, a change to follow Christ with all that I have, not what is left over and live out what God's purpose is for my life...

Letting Life Pass Me By...

I was looking back at the last few months since I have been here and I have realized that I have not really been living life to the fullest. I have just been going through the motions of my day to day tasks. I do love my job and the people I work with, but since I work so much I find it hard to go out and find Christian friends that I can live life and be open with struggles that I am having.

I have also realized I am really good at putting on the facade of looking like I have it all together. But underneath I am screaming for help, I have so many questions and problems. I keep suppressing them so no one will think that I am not good enough.

A few years ago I attended a winter retreat where we talked a lot about exploring your sins and learning to expose them, get help, and grow from that. That was such a life changing weekend for me. But as I look at my life since them I have realized that I have reverted back to hiding everything that I am struggling with to make it look like I don't have any problems.

"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." - James 5:16

God is so good!

I think I have made the right decision to move to Greensburg and God is showing me in little ways. Such as: finding this great place to move into in my price range, the blessing of the family that I am renting off being so hospitable, and the amazing peace I have in this move. Everything has been a smooth transition from the move being relatively easy for having to move on my own, to getting all of my bills and other things set up after I moved.

My family has been such a blessing as well- from the time I told them I was moving they have been supportive of trying to help me find a place from just hearing about it and played a big part in my deciding on the place I did. And since I have decided my mom has been a HUGE help in getting me stuff for my place since I have never officially lived on my own and had to get my own stuff. I am so blessed to have such a great family that is supportive of whatever I choose to do.

Greensburg is a great city as well! It has so much more than where I live before and more people my age! I am excited to start making friends and get more aquatinted with this place.

Tomorrow is my first Sunday at work and I am excited to start meeting people from the church and to see what their service is like! I am also very excited to work for Lieutenants DeMichaels, they are great people and I feel I will learn A LOT from them! I will have my own office, phone line, and a lot more resources. God is so good and I am so glad he is leading me here, I know I was doubting for a bit, but thank God that He knows what's best for me!!

I need to keep going back to one of my favorite passages:

Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight.
-Proverbs 3:5-6

He truly has made my path straight and that led me here to Greensburg and I could not be happier. I pray that I can continue to follow Him and trust him with ALL of my heart!

Living Simply

So these past few weeks have been a crazy wirlwind of events. Two weekends ago I had decided to take a job in the fall with another corps in a town about 35-40 minutes from Monessen. I was really excited about what that would bring in the fall with the new officers and new corps of people. Then, the week following my acceptance of the job I foudnd out that I was gonig to start at that corps earlier than August, I would move there at the end of June! So I started preparing for that. Then, a few days after I was told I was going their at the end of June, I am told that I am going to start at Greenburg on June 13th, and that I had 2 weeks left at Monessen. It was crazy how fast things happen. I trusted God with this job and boy did he provide.

So last weekend I spend a lot of time in Gresnburg looking for an apartment and had gone to a few, but everything was just so expensive! Then on my last drive around looking for apartments I call this one number, but no one answers. I stop at the Greensburg corps to talk to my new bosses about how the search is going and I get a call from the number I had tried earlier. He tells me about the aparrtment I called about and it was way to expensive for me, but then asks if it would just be for me and told me about this efficiency apartment he had about 3 miles from the mall on a farm. I didn't really want to see it, but I figured what could it hurt to go check it out. So I leave the corps and follow my GPS to this apartment. At first when I found out where it was before seeing it I was thinking to myslef- "this could never work," but then I had to wait for the guy to get there and sat down on the swinging bench they had by a pond on the property and really it really was so peaceful and calming after a day of hectic driving and looking at apartments. When the guy showed up and showed me the apartment we went in and it was so small, but so quaint! I really felt like God was saying- I have called you to live simply! And I felt that this would be a perfect place for that.

I called him on my way back tell him I would take the place! I feel so good about this decision of moving to this apartment and think that this job is going to be really great. God is so good, with helping me get everything in order and find an apartment I need in my price range!


God is so good and faithful and it really is all in God's timing!

Trusting God

So I am sorry for those who have been checking my blog, I have totally let it slip...

Throughout the last few days I have seen that God gives us all types of emotions and that just because we are not happy or joyous it doesn't mean that we are not doing God's will. Just yesterday I was just feeling overwhelmed and frustrated and I at first I thought it might have been satan trying to distract me, but I when I look back I think that it might have started out that way, but that God used those emotions to help me get through the day and do what I needed to do.

So often I find myself taking things into my own hands when my moods get like that and that is exactly the opposite of what I need to do. I am now realizing that when I get in situations where I am not in the "right" mood that I need to stop trying to fix it myself and let God work through that emotion and maybe He gave me that emotion to get a point across.

On verse that always comes to mind is where it says that God will not give you more than you can handle and I am comforted knowing that God is faithful to his word.

"ll you need to remember is that God will never let you down; he'll never let you be pushed past your limit; he'll always be there to help you come through it." - 1 Corinthians 10:13 (The Message)

Joy

I have been realizing lately that I have found myself to complain a lot. For some reason I am always looking at the bad side of things instead of what could be or the opportunities. Just looking back I am frustrated with myself for getting that far into complaining and having a complaining spirit. God recently brought me back to a simple but profound Psalm:

Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth.
Worship the LORD with gladness;
come before him with joyful songs.
Know that the LORD is God.
It is he who made us, and we are his [a] ;
we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.
Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.
For the LORD is good and his love endures forever;
his faithfulness continues through all generations.
- Psalm 100

We should always be joyful for what the Lord has provided for us and never take it for granted. We need to continually thank Him for what he has done in our lives and where He is leading us. Ultimately His will for our life will happen if we let it. I feel like when I complain I am not really see what God has put in my life and what He is trying to show me, instead I need to always choose joy and have a thankful heart!

Tis the season...

I cannot believe Chirstmas is less than a week away. I feel like I just moved here. I guess when I got here I kind of hit the ground running with my job and haven't really had a chance to stop. Since I have been here has been a constant learning experience as well, not just at work, but in life. I will say that this job isn't exactly what I thought, but I have grown so much from it.

With all the giving we have been doing this last week it has really made me reevaluate my view of Christmas and giving. Some of the families were so grateful for what we gave, and others greedy for more and not thankful for what they received. I love getting people things for Christmas and know that they will appreciate whatever I get them, but I now know why so many people stress the reason for the season. I can see how so many people can overlook what its all about, not present, but Christ's birth! We are so lucky to have him come and live as a perfect example for us and die to take our sins. But we seem to put getting present as more important, when really we need to be celebrating that amazing gift we were given from our Heavenly Father.

"For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." - Isaiah 9:6

I don't know about you, but I am so lucky to have a God that would send his son, I don't thing even the biggest and best present can top that!

We would love your support

So I know you see the bell ringers all around your area and I bet you wonder what all that money is going to. Well, working with the Salvation Army I now get to see where it goes. All the money you put in goes into keeping each Corps open, your donation helps up serve our area and in turn help the people here. So, if you feel in your heart to give, you can do so online! Just click the above kettle and provide your support!!

Choosing Joy

Last Sunday God really taught me a lesson, not only did He show me I had a complaining attitude, He also reminded me I need to choose joy when situations arise.

It all started when I was waiting for church to start, I had gotten to the church and was mad that people were there early because they forgot to set their clocks back and that I was going to have to sing alone songs that I barely knew (even though I had picked them out). Then, a friend of mine sent me a text that said "Happy Sunday" and I replied back complaining about how bad my Sunday had started out and as I sent that text, God reminded me how much I had been complaining lately. So I grabbed some coffee and went out to the front steps and started to pray and God was really laying on my heart that I needed to start choosing joy and stop complaining, life is not going to change from me complaining all the time. When church starts I go up to sing and I feel like I blew it, but I didn't care, I sang for God while I was up there and that is all that matters. Then Captain starts his message and talks about the man with leprosy and how even though we don't have the physical leprosy, we all have a form of it ourselves- boom, again, mine being complaining. The message was just what I needed to hear. After the service I went up to Captain and first of all thanked him for the great message and told him I was sorry for my attitude at work. My co-workers did not need to here the complaining I was doing.

Then today, the day started out great, but when I got home from work I just got really frustrated and had to leave my house, I went over to a friends house and hung out for a bit, then I left and went for a ride and got to talk to my friend about a topic that is on both our hearts lately (love, relationships, and being lonely) and from that got me thinking about it with the chain of events after work and me thinking about this topic we were just talking about brought my spirits down. It was then time to head off to bible study, I ended up getting there a little early, so I was flipping through my bible and came across these verses
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does."- James 1:2-8

Man that verse hit me, again reminding me when I get down about something or when I am going through trials that I need to choose joy (another reminder) and that I need to preserver through it. I am so blessed to have a God who loves me so much that the devil is trying his hardest get in, but God always brings it back.

I just have to give all my anxieties to God and trust that He is taking care of it in HIS TIME, not ours and through that we can choose joy!

God's beauty

So I can't help but love the fall. I definitely think it is my favorite time of year. The colors changing on the trees, the beauty of the mountain side covered in reds, yellows, and oranges. I don't know how someone couldn't see God's beauty in this season.

I feel like so often I take things that God has blessed us with for granted because we expect them instead of thanking Him for it. Like: the seasons, the stars, the diversity of His people, the talents he has given each of us, and much more.

God created all of these things for us and I know, personally, I need to be reminded every once and a while and put myself in check to not try and take each blessing and beautiful creation God has given us for granted, but to thank Him daily for blessing us with it!

When I think of His beauty, I was reminded of a song that we sang during our nursing home visit, How Great Thou Art. While I was singing it and after singing it the first two verses were so powerful and so fitting for the season:

O Lord my God, When I in awesome wonder,
Consider all the worlds Thy Hands have made;
I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder,
Thy power throughout the universe displayed.

Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, How great Thou art.
Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, How great Thou art!

When through the woods, and forest glades I wander,
And hear the birds sing sweetly in the trees.
When I look down, from lofty mountain grandeur
And see the brook, and feel the gentle breeze.

It is such a great song and it was such a great reminder to thank God for all he has given us!

New Family

So I have been here in Monessen for about 2 months now and have really been blessed with a great support system here. Today I have come to realize how lucky I am, I know I have felt alone in a lot of things, but looking back, I would be worse off without all of these people here.

My roommates are so great and so friendly, I love watching movies and just the discussions we have are great. Amanda, my bosses wife has been there for me to vent and we are a lot alike, so it helps having her around. The teens and kids I work with are great, they keep me going on Tuesdays and Thursday. A newer person that has been a blessing is Amy, she is the new office assistant here at work and she is so amazing, she feels the same frustrations I do and we get each other with that. Today as she was leaving she offered to get me dinner because she knew I would be here until bible study was done, it was so great to know she cares that much. The new GW interns are great too, we have hung out quite a bit the last week and they have been keeping me sane, I love hanging out with people, especially my age and that have the same interests as me, I am so blessed to have them around. My friend Ryan has been a good friend too, him and his wife are great people to hang out with and really challenge me in my faith.

I know Satan has really been attacking me this past month, but I am not allowing him to do that any more. I am way to blessed to let him drag me down. God is really showing me this week, now that I have had time to slow down and really take it all in, that I am truly blessed to be able to come back here and that I can't let Satan get to me like he has been. God is so good and I thank Him for getting me through this tough time and showing me all the new "family" he has blessed me with here in Monessen.

Unsure

So I haven't written in a while because I feel like I need to write positive things and I haven't had much of that lately. I know a lot of it is Satan trying to break me down, but it's working. I am feeling really alone here. I don't have friends here that I hang out regularly and I hate that. I am a people person and don't get me wrong, the people from work/church are great and the kids in my youth group are great, but I need more interaction with people my age and I don't have many friends that age. One of my friends just moved away to do this amazing year of missions and my other friend works a lot and has a lot of other friends, so we never really hang out. It is hitting me hard lately. I am trying to be honest and let people know how I am feeling, but I don't want my boss to know and have him get worried, so I am trying to keep it on the DL, but I feel like it could start effecting my work, I hope not, but the reality is that it might.

I know that I am here serving God and that I am suppose to be here, but I felt so different here last year and hope that this is really what I am suppose to be doing by myself. I know that here I get to serve and help a lot of people and hopefully act like Jesus and humbly serve people here, but because I am doing it alone (which is my fault for having no accountability) Satan is attacking big time and I don't know what to do about it.

I just ask that if you are reading this that you pray for me to stay strong and know that God will get me through this. I really need some help right now....

My "new" life

So last week I started my new job as a "real" person. I cannot believe that I am done with college and am living on my own.

I moved back to Monessen last Monday and have been on the go ever since. It is so nice to coming back to a place that I am familiar with and have connections with already. It is kind of a nice transition though, I live with four other girls who are all going to the college here. I still feel like I am living in that college lifestyle while I am home, but a working woman lifestyle while I am running around for work.

I had the day off yesterday and got to have lunch with a good friend of mine from around here and we were just talking about life and what a Christian looks like now, compared to a few years ago and how that is changing. I agree that there is a change going on. Personally I live by verse in Micah.
He has showed you, O man, what is good.
And what does the LORD require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God.
- Micah 6:8
God simply asks us to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly. I feel that this is exactly what Jesus did and if we are to strive to be like Jesus we should follow this verse.

I have also been learning a lot about Grace and how we recieve it and give it. It is hard to recieve it sometimes, but when we can finally do that, it is so much easier to give it to people.
You are the most excellent of men and your lips have been anointed with
grace, since God has blessed you forever.
-Psalm 45:2

Heading Home

Wow...where has this summer gone? I cannot believe I will be home on Tuesday. I feel like I was just packing to go to Philadelphia wondering what this crazy summer would look like and not even be able to phathom all that could happen...and I was right.

God has blessed me so much with traveling to different sites and being able to help them out. He has also given me some great friends that I will never forget, each site unique and great! I feel like I was given the best job of the summer, I got to travel, be an extra help and bless people with that, and still serve youth in the same context at each place. I couldn't have asked for a better position.

God challenged me with things that could have come up, but knew that I could do if I trusted in Him. This will be a summer I will never forget, from Philadelphia and the amazing city it is, to Birmingham and all of the history there, to finally New Orleans where I got to see some great southern hospitality and still help out with Hurricane Katrina and see how the people who live here truly love where they live.

I wouldn't trade this summer for anything else!

The summer is winding down...

Wow, there is only 2 more weeks of the summer left! Where did this summer go? Who knew I would travel this much. God had some great plans for me this summer and I am glad I got to follow Him to all of these places. He introduced me to great people who love God and some great youth!

I try not to plan a lot in the future, but I also have to be realistic and I frankly, I am nervous when I get home. I get home the 11th of August and leave home the 16th of August. In that time I have to pack my life up and get pack it into my car to move to Monessen to start my job on the 18th. I also am in a wedding on the 15th, lets just say its going to be a crazy couple of days. Hopefully when I get to Monessen and all moved in things will start to settle down (but I doubt it :P)

I found out last week that I will be in the Southeast the rest of the summer, so I booked my flight home. Its crazy to think that New Orleans could be my last stop before home. I love the staff here, they are all great. I also miss the staff from Philly and Birmingham. I know that they're doing great though, they were some solid staff!

I cannot wait to go to the Southeast exit RAMP and see some new faces and see some friends that I haven't seen in a while that are in this region. God is funny the way he brings friends together and I am excited to see who I am going to know there!

NOLA

So last Sunday I got a call and a few hours later I was on my way to New Orleans, Louisiana. I never saw that coming. They needed my help here because next weekend is the national ELCA convention, which happens every 3 years, and it is being held here in New Orleans; so they called in reinforcements. The staff here is great, I really connected with them right away. I also cannot believe that I just finished my 5th week of programing and that there is only 3 weeks left! I feel like this summer is flying by!

Wow, who would have thought I would have ended up in NOLA. God is so great and truly knows the ultimate plan. I love that all I can do this summer is trust that and know that I am going where God wants me to go.

One great thing about being here is that I might be able to see some old friends from school that have moved down here! She has recently gotten married and I was really sad to have missed her wedding, but now that I am down here I can see her. I hope I get to see some of my other friends as well that have moved down here.

Who would have guessed!

I just had my first week in Birmingham and it was great! The staff is awesome and I get along with them really well. I am so lucky to come to a staff that is so great, I couldn't be any luckier.

A funny thing happened this week. I was in the kitchen on Sunday making dinner for the groups coming and one of the things that happens when the kids arrive is that they get a tour of the building and go through the kitchen and the first group comes through and I am busy working on dinner and here, "Oh my goodness, its Brenna." I was a little confused as to why they were so excited to see me, they didn't know me (or so I thought). I look up and it's a group that was at my site last summer in Osage! It was so great to see them again. God works in mysterious ways. He totally knew I was a little nervous to start at a whole new site, not knowing the building very well yet, or even the town and that I could use a something that is familiar and he did. It was such a blessing to be able to reconnect with these kids.

All in all the first week here was great and I am excited for what God has for me here, as long as I am here. God is good :)

Birmingham, here I come!

So I got my first move of the summer! I got a call Thursday night and was on a plane Friday morning to Birmingham, AL. I spent all day on planes and in the airport and arrived in Birmingham around 6:40. It has been a crazy and long past few days, but I knew this was part of my job and am really excited to see what Birmingham is like and how I can help serve the team here!

God knew that I was getting complacent there, He knew that it was "easy" for me to stay in Philly. Plus, the Philly team is rockin' and can do great with the four of them, I am excited to hear about the rest of their summer! I am sad to leave, but excited to see all of what God has in store for me here. I am fully trusting in God this summer that He will lead me where I am suppose to go and where I can best help/fit.

If you would like to be praying for the staff here and for staying healthy and for the girl who is sick that she gets better. Also just pray that we can all get along well and that I will be a help, not a hindrance to this team.